Dr. C. S. Lovett’s
MARANATHA FAMILY NEWSLETTER
JANUARY 2025

GOD LOVES THE DIVORCEE
“Dr. Lovett, my husband divorced me six years ago to marry another woman. Since he is still alive, would I be living in a state of adultery if I married again?”
Good question! You see it is a lot easier to give counsel after a divorce has taken place. Because once a divorce has occurred, the counsel is then directed at making the best of the situation. In that case, some godly wisdom makes the answer rather conspicuous (James 1:5). I picked up on her usage of the term “state of adultery,” and made it the basis of my reply. Adultery is a SIN, not a state. It is something you COMMIT, not something you CREATE. The Lord Jesus said it in Matthew 5:35. It is my view that this should be regarded as a SINGLE SIN, one which can be confessed and forgiven the same as any other sin.
The lady was delighted with my reply. It set her free from the legalistic teaching which had bound her for years. I am pleased when the truth sets people free from bondage, but it works both ways. Sometimes the truth is NOT what a person wants to hear at all as in the case of this lady. “I’m sorry but you can no longer teach in our church! You are a fine teacher and we hate to lose you, but our church has a policy against divorced persons holding any kind of office! “Those words broke her heart.
THE BASIC PREMISE
Here is the guiding principle behind my counsel: If the marriage is making you more like Satan than Jesus, it is defeating God’s purpose in the marriage. God’s goal for us is that we become like His Son (Rom. 8:29). It hurts God to see His children become more and more like the devil every day. He would rather have the marriage end than watch a son or daughter throw away their growth opportunity in a ruinous marriage.
Before advising Christians, I first explore to see if their marriage is making them BITTER OR BETTER. If it is clear the marital pressures are making them more like Jesus (better), I counsel them to stay married despite the pain involved. On the other hand, if marriage is making them more like Satan (bitter) then they should think about divorce. For when the marriage is WORSE THAN DIVORCE, God is the big loser.
GOD IS LIKE A DOCTOR
Doctors hate to amputate limbs, but when gangrene sets in or cancer spreads, they will do it to save a life. In the same way God, though HATING DIVORCE, will quickly tolerate one to salvage a child trapped in an evil marriage. It is the lesser of two evils. God is not legalistic as some men are. He understands there is no way to IMPOSE a perfect law on imperfect people and expects it to work every time.
On the other hand, He cannot establish anything less than a perfect law, for His laws spring from His being. There is no way a sinful man can live up to God’s perfect standard. Consequently, there will always be casualties in the marriage program and God is fully aware of it, even if men are not. (1st John 2:1). He is a compassionate God.
BUT DOESN’T GOD HATE DIVORCE?
Yes, and He flatly says so . . . “I hate divorce!” (Mal. 2:16 NIV).
There is no question that God hates divorce, but when does He ever get His way with everything? Fame, fortune, family, and fun seem to be the forces driving modern believers, rather than the reality of Jesus. What God likes or doesn’t like takes second place. Of course, He would like to see His marriage law working perfectly, but when have any of his perfect laws worked perfectly with imperfect people? Certainly, they did not in Old Testament times and things are no better in our day.
Now there is something God hates more than divorce. When marriage which is designed to make people like Christ, does the opposite and makes them LIKE SATAN, He is hurt. HE HATES IT WHEN THAT HAPPENS. God would be the last one to tell a wife to stay in the situation. He would say, as He did to Moses, “Write her a bill of divorcement?” (Deut. 24:1,2). As much as He hates divorce, He hates an evil marriage even more.
JESUS’ COMMENT ON MOSES’ LAW
When the Pharisees question Jesus about divorce, He replied with the original intention: “For this cause shall a man leave his father and mother and cleave to his wife and the two shall be one flesh” (Matt. 19:5). The Pharisees then asked, “Why did Moses command that a man give his wife a certificate of divorce and send her away?” Jesus replied, “Moses permitted you to divorce your wives because your hearts were hard. . .” (Matt. 19:7,8).
Note how the Lord said, “YOUR HEARTS,” not the hearts of the ancient Israelites. That is because human nature has not changed. Those hearing the Lord in person were no different than their ancestors. And we in America are no different either. Without the relief valve of divorce, there would be dead wives. If divorce were not possible today, people would respond as did Jesus’ disciples: “If this is the situation between a husband and wife, it is better not to marry” (Matt. 19:10).
THE LETTER VERSUS THE SPIRIT
“For the letter killeth, but the Spirit giveth life” (2 Cor. 3:6 KJV). How easy for men to thump “the letter of the law” and point the accusing finger at the divorced Christian. They leave no room for marital casualties, whereas they willingly leave room for other kinds of casualties. There are accidents in marriage, just as there are accidents in other areas of life. Not all can be deemed strong just because they bear the name Christian. Believers can be found spread over a vast range of differences in strength and understanding. It’s a shame when any are crushed under the letter of the law.
Too few know God’s Word well enough to know His heart. They will work eight hours a day to make a living but will not spend eight minutes getting to know Him personally—through His Word. Consequently, they are unable to judge the difference between living by the LETTER of the law and living by the SPIRIT of the law. If they did, they would know that God is a FATHER, NOT A LAWYER. Men focus on chapter and verse, totally ignoring God’s heart. They don’t realize that New Testament legalism is just as hateful as that of the Scribes and Pharisees. I think to God’s mind, divorce is far more tolerable THAN GOSSIP! That is satanic. It is done for the fiendish pleasure it brings the gossiping Christian. No one is locked into gossip as people are locked into marriage. Yet, there are people banned from the church office for gossiping! See men don’t think as God thinks and that brings us to. . .
THE COMPASSIONATE SIDE OF DIVORCE
The “BITTER or BETTER” approach I have presented here is fully Scriptural, but there is no way for me to prove it in the small space of this article. Some may not agree with what I have said here. The fair thing to do would be to read my book, THE COMPASSIONATE SIDE OF DIVORCE, where I have room to set forth the Biblical basis and show how God uses it. If you are facing a divorce or know of someone who is suffering under the bondage of legalism, you will do them a great kindness if you place a copy of this book in their hands. By doing this you may rescue them from a horrible situation and point them to . . .
A BETTER WAY
C. S. Lovett
Copyright © 2024 Personal Christianity
(This book is out of print. However, you can search online to purchase a used copy. Search on Abebooks.com and Thriftbooks.com)
TESTIMONIES
WAY OF LIFE: “ I discovered your book, WITNESSING MADE EASY, in a secondhand store. It is the best on witnessing that I have ever read. My husband and I have practiced your methods for many years and consider it a way of life, our fun hobby and have taught it to our children. We had some fabulous experiences. Praise the Lord!” (D. M.—AK)
SINCE YOU ASKED
Question: “I’m confused and need help. Some have said no specific reference to the rapture can be found in the book of Revelation. If you disagree, please tell me where you see the rapture in the mysterious book. I want to settle it in my own mind.”
Answer: True, the word “rapture” does not appear in the Revelation, but I see the event very clearly in Chapter 11 where the two witnesses went up to heaven in a cloud (vs. 12). In fact, they were called, the same as those in the rapture passage of 1 Thess.4;17 where a lot of detail is provided. It can be shown that the Lord is descending in a cloud and the believers who are alive at the time are caught up to meet Him in the air.
A companion passage is Chapter 14:14-16, where the earth is harvested of its fruit by one like a son of man” seated on a white cloud. The symbolism is quite clear. But you have to read on to note the second harvest, where the unsaved are brought to their judgment.
RESOURCES
LOVETT'S LIGHTS ON ROMANS (2024): 360 pages. Available on Amazon.com for $15.99 HERE.
LOVETTS LIGHTS ON ACTS (2023): 407 pages. Available on Amazon.com for $15.99 HERE.
LOVETT'S LIGHTS ON THE SERMON ON THE MOUNT (2022) 372 pages. Available on Amazon.com for $15.99 HERE.
LOVETT'S LIGHTS ON JOHN (2021): 381 pages. Available on Amazon.com for $15.99 HERE.
WITNESSING MADE EASY (2019): 213 pages. Available on Amazon.com for $14.99 HERE.
DEALING WITH THE DEVIL (2018): 242 PAGES. Available on Amazon.com for $14.99 HERE.
THE PREPARED LIFE (2017): 159 pages. Available on Amazon.com for $13.99 and is also available in Kindle form for $7.99 HERE.
CONTACT US:
If you would like to send us a letter, comment, or prayer request, you may contact us at:
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"Preparing for His Appearng" Since 1951